Have we known that “we need to judge less and understand more?” no. I suppose we have become prey of our minds to the extent that we have moved our success journey based on what others say onto us and judge on our journey. Focused people do not judge. They assess. They create a balanced thesis of situations not people. This is not an argument but information.
Today, I unusually walked from Luzira to Nakawa and fortunately, I met a student I teach at one of the universities in Uganda. I had a chat and some usual fun. “I am burning the fats” I said to her. Should I give you money for transport sir? She asked. I responded, what a morning offer. I love it. I received her 10,000 offer with joy. Then on pocketing it, I put it on a bunch of what Fresh Daddy called “Amaziike”. She noted, so you have been kwelumya yet you have 50,000 notes. Anyway….. the story ended with fan and some 1km walk to work. I then said, they will judge you anyway. Never judge an eagle by the opinion of turkeys. This is the puzzle we all face. They judge us based on their limitations and anticipations of what we are. Not actually what we are.
Everything you do, there will be people who will judge you. They will appear to know everything about you. They will claim monopoly of the success equation. They will tell you how you ought to have done it. They will tell you that you are dating a broke babe or guy. They will tell you that the flights you make are paid for by others. That you have no iota of paying your own flight even a bombardier is too expensive for you. They will tell you and others how you were deported from the recent UK trip. They will tell you that the world has Corona virus that you should not travel. They will tell you that the guy you are dating is poor and is married. I am telling you. They will tell you that you are destined to failure. Most likely they will tell you that you are too old to get married or too young when you get married today. They will judge that the guy has a bold age that he is using cream and hair die to keep younger than his age. The lady you are dating is a slat they will say all this. I just don’t know what they will not tell you. Some people love to judge others based on their past weaknesses, mistakes and failures, but expect those same people to judge them by their current improved conditions.
We live in a society where people who did not go to Law Development Centre are masters of judgment. They will judge you all your actions and inactions. They will judge your judgment to the extent of judging their judgment. I tell you today, live your own life. Those who judge you either fear you or are below you. Some are scared of your rise. Some are too inferior to be able to see your journey triumph. And to the extent of your appreciation of what they say onto you, you will succeed and or not succeed.
I have over time learnt that if you judge people, you have no time to love them. When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself. Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. We should not judge people by their peak of excellence or failure but by the distance they have traveled from the point where they started.
If you want to be successful in life, pay no attention to what people say of feel about you. If your heart tells you that he is a right man, marry. If you feel you are in love, love again in return. If you feel it is right, pay no attention to their actions otherwise you will fail and they will still judge you.
We have accustomed to getting more interested in what others are doing and forgotten what we are supposed to do. Perhaps, if you weren’t so busy regarding their shortcomings, you would find that they do possess redeeming qualities, discreet as they may be I have always said and this to some degree has been tested that “a person doesn’t ever truly know another person. Therefore rather ask them what but not conclusive even when you are told. In all your life and dealings, I reiterate once more, forgive the offenders to let divine justice be made
I know you will still judge me and others will say I write too much. You will judge me the way I do thing but I at least do them my way.
I thank you.
The writer is a junior citizen, and a lead mentor for the Next generational Leaders .